Every Letter I Never Sent

She had kept every single one of his letters — fourteen of them, bound with a faded blue ribbon — even though she had promised herself, at least a dozen times, that she would throw them away. It was the promise inside the last one that she could never quite let go of.
Elena Vasquez had met Daniel Okafor the summer she was twenty-two, during a language exchange program in Lisbon. She had been studying Portuguese literature. He had been studying her, or so her friends teased, because he always seemed to find a reason to sit at the same café table on the narrow cobblestone street near the university.
The café was called something forgettable, but the blue-and-white azulejo tiles on its walls were not. Neither was the way Daniel always ordered his coffee too strong and then made a face at the first sip, every single morning, as if he had not expected it.
They became friends the way slow things become inevitable — gradually, then all at once.
Long conversations that stretched past closing time. Walks along the Tagus River at dusk when the water turned the color of copper. His laugh, which was quieter than she expected from a man who filled every room he entered. Her habit of underlining sentences in books and reading them aloud to him, demanding to know if he felt what she felt.
He always did.
But the program ended in August, and Elena went back to Barcelona, and Daniel went back to London, and the world between them became fourteen letters written over the following year — careful, warm, slightly formal in the way that people are when they are trying very hard not to say the thing they actually mean.
The last letter ended with a promise.
“If we are both still lost by the time we are thirty,” he had written, “let’s find each other in Lisbon. Same café. First Saturday of September. I’ll be the one making a face at the coffee.”
She had laughed when she read it. She had also cried, a little, though she would not have admitted that to anyone.
Life, as it tends to do, got in the way. A relationship that lasted three years and ended quietly. A career that took her to Madrid, then to Rome, then back to Barcelona. She assumed Daniel had built something solid in London — a life too full to leave room for old promises made over bad coffee in a foreign city.
She turned thirty in March.
By August, she had convinced herself the promise was just a beautiful thing that two young people had said, the kind of thing that belongs to the version of yourself you leave behind in summer cities.
She booked the flight to Lisbon anyway.
She told herself it was for the literature festival. She told herself she simply missed the city. She did not let herself think too carefully about which Saturday she had chosen to arrive.
The café was still there. The tiles were exactly as she remembered — blue and white, slightly chipped at the corners, glowing in the early September light. She arrived at nine in the morning and sat at the table nearest the window, and she ordered coffee she did not particularly want, and she opened a book she did not read a single word of.
By ten o’clock, the table across from her was still empty.
She told herself she was not disappointed. She turned a page she had not read. She watched a pigeon investigate a crumb near the door with tremendous seriousness.
At ten past ten, the door opened.
Daniel Okafor was taller than she remembered, or maybe she had simply forgotten the specific way he occupied space — unhurried, certain, like a person who had decided long ago not to rush through things. His hair was shorter. There were small lines at the corners of his eyes that had not been there at twenty-three. He was scanning the room with an expression she recognized immediately: careful hope, trying very hard to look like something else.
His eyes found her.
For a moment, neither of them moved.
Then he crossed the room, sat down in the chair across from her, picked up the small menu, and studied it with great concentration for approximately four seconds before setting it down and saying, without looking up, “They still make it too strong.”

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Elara Wynford

Elara Wynford — Her dreams comes true or not? Who knows, she stopped differentiating reality from dreams 10 years ago. Each of her stories has part of a dream…
— Elara Wynford

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